|“||I'll be having my body back, you undead fuck.||”|
—Magnus, to Edward and Lydia
Magnus Hyphen Terry "The Hammer" Burnsides is a player character in The Balance Arc campaign who is puppetted by Travis McElroy. He is a human fighter who was trained in rogue skills by Carey Fangbattle during the third Lunar Interlude. He has a lawful good alignment with a history of carpentry. He once made a pretty awesome chair, impressing the entire town and becoming a folk hero. Helping with this are his roots as "common folk" and his rustic charm. Magnus is a "man of action" who believes that "thinking is for other people."
Magnus had, as of episode 56, been reduced to the body of a humanoid Mannequin, as his original body had been destroyed fully. Good thing there was a fresh new one sitting in the back room of the Fantasy Costco.
Early Life Edit
Magnus's introduction to being a 'protector' was defending a mongrel dog from three bullies and got beaten up to protect the dog and allow it to escape. This solidified his need to defend those that are weaker than him.
The Stolen Century Edit
When going through his past memories with June, he encounters a long stretch of static in his memories. This is the time period of Magnus being part of the Red Robes.
Raven's Roost Edit
Five years before his adventure with Merle and Taako began, Magnus lead a revolt against Mad Governor Kalen. When the city of Raven's Roost had been founded, people stood behind Kalen, but Kalen saw his power as endless and become corrupt. In retaliation, Magnus gathered people together and defeated Kalen and his soldiers in battle. Unfortunately, Kalen managed to escape, and was subsequently forgotten about in the months to pass.
After the rebellion, Magnus worked in Hammer and Tongs, the pride of the Craftsman Corridor in Raven's Roost. His mentor and blacksmith/general craftsman, Steven Waxmen, had taken Magnus in after a promising apprenticeship. Magnus worked on a black oak rocking chair with a lavender polish imbued into it, that he would submit to the Continental Craftsmen Showcase that took place in Neverwinter, a ten days drive from Raven's Roost. Julia, Steven's daughter and Magnus's new bride, entered the shop, talked as they usually did, and brought Magnus out to the cart that she had prepared for him. Magnus left with his rocking chair for the showcase, after shaking Steven's hand and kissing Julia and telling her he loved her.
Two days into his travel to Neverwinter, Kalen returned to Raven's Roost, with a "If I can't have this city, no one can" mentality, and bombed the support column for the Craftsmen Corridor. 76 people were killed, including Julia and Steven. Hammer and Tong was destroyed and in the time is took Magnus to return to Raven's Roost, the town had evacuated, due to fear of a repeat attack.
As a result of his past he has no fear of death and looks forward to meeting Julia again in the afterlife.
Here There Be Gerblins Edit
After Taako is knocked out by Magic Brian during a magical wizard duel in Wave Echo Cave, Magnus saves Taako's life with a healing potion, and in the process unknowingly imparts upon Taako the knowledge of the word "cheese."
Powers and Abilities Edit
- Rustic Hospitality: Magnus is beloved by the common people, who will shield him from his enemies and give him food and shelter when needed.
- Master Carpenter: His test to become a Master Carpenter involved building a really good chair, which he named SitBoy 1 (unless his numbering system began prior to becoming a Master Carpenter).
- Protection Fighter: While wielding a shield, can impose disadvantage on attack rolls against characters within 5 feet.
- Vehicle Proficiency
- Animal Proficiency
- Lever proficiency
- Severing arms proficiency
Known Physical Traits Edit
Disclaimer: The McElroys do not consider their versions of their characters any more "canon" than anyone else's - there is no obligation to stick to these in fanart, so please do not be rude to people for ignoring these traits.
|Trait||Episode Mentioned / Introduced|
|Muscular, VERY buff||Frequently referred to|
|MAGNIFICENT sideburns||Episode 1|
|A beard||Episode 1|
|Has a penis||Episode 20|
|Skin has green undertones||Episode 29|
|Scar over eye||Episode 40, possibly earlier|
|Auburn hair (before) / greying auburn hair (after)||Episode 54|
|32 years old (before) / 42 (after)||Episode 54|
|Forget all that stuff, he's a featureless mannequin now||Episode 56|
|Nevermind, he's a pre-Wonderland human again||Episode 59|
Official Outfits Edit
Usually, Magnus is dressed as a typical human fighter.
|Outfit Name||Description||Arc Used|
|The Bear||In Ep. 23, Magnus takes on the racing persona The Bear, complete with bear mask.||Petals to the Metal|
|Safety First||Everyone, even Steven, gets a null suit to counteract the crystallization of Lucas's lab.||Crystal Kingdom|
|A Cool Look for A Hot Summer Day||In Ep. 41, the gang visits Fantasy Costco to prepare for a hot mission. Magnus picks up camouflage-print cargo shorts, but he also would like them to be enchanted so he doesn’t have to worry about sand getting all up in there, if you know what he means. At his request Garfield the Deals Warlock enchants his shorts.||The Eleventh Hour|
|The Return of... i' Morko! (it's Elvish for Bear)||In The Adventure Zone Presents: The Live Boston Stunt Spectacular, Magnus becomes Jess the Beheader's wrestling partner. His outfit includes his bear mask from the Battle Wagon Race, and a half furry suit with a breast plate. The breast plate has eleven nipples (not where you'd expect).||Chaos Stadium|
|IPRE uniforms||In Ep. 60, Magnus opts for the jacket instead of the robe. The uniforms are "crisp and bright red" with the IPRE logo on the left breast pocket. Magnus wears his with no shirt underneath. Just jacket.||The Stolen Century|
Deaths and Major Injuries Edit
Death Count Edit
Magnus has died a total of 32 times.
- While traveling through other planes as a Red Robe, Magnus died 19 times without crossing over to the Astral Plane:
- Magnus died a total of 11 times during the events of The Eleventh Hour.
- Magnus temporarily had his soul knocked out of his body by the Animus Bell during the events of The Suffering Game. He got better.
- Magnus was killed in his Mannequin body by The Hunger in Ep. 59. He got better from that too.
Items both currently owned and lost by Magnus throughout the show.
Current Items Edit
These are items currently within Magnus's possession as of the most recent episode.
|Item||Episode Acquired||Item Type||Notes|
|Short Bow||1||Weapon||Ranged attacks|
|Heavy chains||4||Tool||Gathered by Magnus in the crusher room|
|Loafers of Striding and Springing||3||Armor/Clothing; Enchanted/Haunted Item||Stolen from the dead Thardin Rockseeker; gifted to Magnus by Taako|
|Nude drawings of women from homeland||4||Trinket||Hmmmmmm...|
|Bracer of Balance||9||Magical Artifact||On Magnus's left arm|
|Railsplitter||9||Weapon||From Gachapon machine; can cut down any tree with a single swipe (+1 battle axe)|
|Phantom Fist||9||Magical Artifact||Purchased for 400GP from Fantasy Costco; knocks back enemies during unarmed attacks|
|(Infinite) Heavy Bean||15||Magical Artifact; Food and Drink||Given to Magnus by Graham, a.k.a. "Juicy Wizard."|
|Fletcher's Mitt||17||Magical Artifact; Armor/clothing||Green cloth glove; catch arrows out of the air or avoid projectile (+1 AC against ranged non-magical attacks)|
|Lens of Straight Creepin'||17||Tool; Magical artifact||Purchased at Fantasy Costco; tracks the paths of enemies/quarry|
|Tankard of Potent Drink||17||Tool; Enchanted/Haunted Item||Purchased at Fantasy Costco; allows user to drink a lot or sober up; Given to Paloma in "Eleventh Hour" but jumps back into Magnus' bag when the loop resets.|
|Steven the Fish||17||Pet and Best Friend||A normal goldfish in a magical, spherical tank|
|Bear Mask||23||Armor/Clothing||From Hurley for the Battle Wagon Race|
|Capt. Captain Bain's badge||27||Trinket||Badge stolen from dead body|
|Defender's Dial||28||Armor/Clothing; Defensive item||A belt with a dial in the middle containing three images: a flame, an ice cube, and a lightning bolt. Once a day, the belt will grant the wearer resistance against a certain type for 5 minutes depending on what it is set to: fire, ice, lightning.|
|Shield of Heroic Memories||28||Defensive Item; Enchanted/Haunted Item||Remembers battles and adds +1 to AC on any subsequent battle with creatures of that type; can be lied to|
|The Glutton's Fork||28||Tool; Food and Drink||Basically, eat any non-magical item that can fit in your mouth. Used to eat a grand relic...sort of.|
|Music Box||29||Gift||Johann's mixtape.|
|Whetstone||29||Gift||From Killian; personalized and shaped like a duck|
|Airplane Bottles of Booze||29||Gift||Gift from Avi|
|"Caleb Cleveland, Kid Cop" Book||29||Gift||Gift from Angus|
|Iron-on badge||29||Gift||Dark blue circles, iron on; twelve circles around the outside; unreadable language in the center; comes with note that reads "For Your Eyes Only"|
|Cockroach Mandible||33||Weapon||Taken from giant cockroach|
|Black Opal Mirror||35||Magical Artifact||Small, perfectly circular black gemstone disk with flecks of red and green and blue color. Fell out of trash bin in the Cosmoscope room in Lucas Miller's laboratory. Resonates with The Hunger plane. Lucas let Magnus take it, saying it didn't resonate with any of the planes.|
|Thieves' Tools||40||Tool||Given to Magnus by Carey Fangbattle after they completed their rogue training montage together|
|Champion's Belt||40||Defensive Item; Armor/Clothing||This ornate belt is given to someone who has bested all opponents in a test of strength. Once per day, the wearer may substitute their Strength score for their Wisdom or Charisma score when making a skill check.|
|Featherweight Curiass||40||Weapon; Defensive Item||Dark, gray feathers made of super-light, studded leather; chest armor; +3 to acrobatics, same AC as previous armor|
|Magnetic Charge||40||Weapon; Defensive Item||Fist-sized ball that produces magnetic field that repels metal objects|
|Tarantula Bracelet||40||Magical Artifact||Gives silent climbing action|
|Rapier||40||Weapon||A light fencing sword available to Rogues|
|Health Potion x2||40||Purchased with extra pool money|
|Chance Lance||47||Weapon; Magical Artifact||Gift of Istus; pops time bubbles, comes back when you call it|
|Ring of the Giant-Slayer||50||Jewelry; Enchanted/Haunted Item||Copper ring; gives +1 AC and +1 attack against huge shit|
|Pocket Workshop||50||Enchanted/Haunted Item||A pocket Woodworking shop|
|Grappling Hook||50||Tool||Good for 1 use per day to climb something like Batman|
|Marionette Arm||55||Arm||The first step to rebuilding the collection that was lost to the Purple Worm|
|Flaming Poisoning Raging Sword Of Doom||59||Weapon||Summoned back to Magnus using the Sapphire Taako left for him.|
Former Items Edit
These are items which were lost or given away.
|Item||Episode Acquired /
|Battle Axe||1 / 9||Weapon||Sold to Fantasy Costco after acquiring Railsplitter|
|Shield||1 / 28||Defensive Item||Sold to Fantasy Costco after purchase of Shield of Heroic Memories|
|Healing Potion||3 / ?||Magical Artifact||Used to heal Taako|
|Deck of Cheating Cards||5 / ?||Trinket||Acquired after freeing Kurtze; sold to Fantasy Costco|
|Stone of Far Speech||9 / 57||Tool||Purchased for $200 from Fantasy Costco; fantasy walkie talkie. Two given to Taako and Merle. Destroyed by Barry Bluejeans.|
|Super Fuck-Up Potion||10 / 10||Magical Item||Given by Robbie; drunk by Magnus on the way to Rockport|
|Hammerhead Uniform||22 / 22||Armor/Clothing||Disguises stolen from sleeping Hammerhead gang members|
|Safety Harness||23 / 25ish||Armor/Clothing||From Hurley to Magnus|
|Carved figure of Johann||29 / 29||Gift||Given to Johann, carved from Rosewood|
|Carved wooden duck||29 / 29||Gift||Given to Killian|
|Coupon, One Free Backrub||29 / 29||Gift||Given to Lucretia|
|Potty Chairs||29 / 29||Gift||Given to Merle and Taako|
|Wooden Ring||40||Gift||Given to Carey to give to Killian|
|Headlamp||44||Tool||Mineshaft-only item; Ep. 44|
|Robot Arms||Various / 49||Arms||Magnus's careful collection of robot arms lost to the Purple Worm|
(Magnus takes care of his things.)
Fan Art Edit
- The posters Magnus hangs in his room in the Bureau of Balance are "a Jess the Beheader poster and a tour poster for Fantasy Dave Matthews Band."
- Magnus carries with him a knife once owned by a relative. He was once pretty confident it would come back into play in his life, but he probably doesn't remember he has it packed in his things.
- Magnus is an only child. He is glad to have found Merle and Taako, and considers Angus to be a little brother.
- Magnus does not have anxiety.
- Magnus is afraid of spiders, has "no" weaknesses, and is allergic to sulfa-based medications.
- Magnus is not asexual, but "events in his backstory have left him completely uninterested in romance."
- Magnus' favorite candy is Turkish Delights.
- Magnus has 8 homemade "Big Dog" tee shirts.
- Magnus is a mead guy.
- Beauty and the Beast is the Disney movie that made Magnus cry the most. Fantasy Seinfeld is his favorite sitcom. He would love everything HGTV, including Property Brothers. He would probably be a big Green Lantern fan. His favorite podcast would be Can I Pet Your Dog.
- He would see getting bitten by a fantasy werewolf as a net positive. Magnus thinks the Gelatinous Cube is cute and "so squishy."
- Magnus would take a fantasy bullet for Taako or Merle "in a heartbeat."
- Magnus is 1000% #TeamBigDog
- Magnus can lift 3 other members of the Bureau of Balance on a good day. Despite this, he doesn't really train, he's a naturally burly boy. That said, if Magnus were in the Olympics, he'd be best at "shotput, javelin, [and] weightlifting."
- Magnus names all the chairs he makes like so: "SitBoy 1, SitBoy 2, SitBoy 3," etc.
- Magnus took a potion so he would never have to maintain his facial hair. It tasted like licorice.
- Magnus gets jealous of Merle and Taako's magic "ALL THE TIME," but he's able to channel his anger into flexing, which calms him down. If he could steal a magical spell, it would probably be something that would let him fly.
- Response to question "Magnus fuck, marry, kill between Taako, Merle, and Upsy?": "He'd Marry Taako and Merle. He'd kill Upsy. He wouldn't 'F' anyone. Not his style."
- Magnus would never get rid of Rail Splitter.
- Magnus doesn't have tattoos, just scars.
- If Magnus had a theme song, it would be this.
- Magnus does not comfortably give up merchandising.
- According to himself, Magnus has a "beautiful, large-dicked body." On the contrary, Clint McElroy claimed that "it looks like I've [Magnus had] been swimming" while the Trés Horny Boys had their bodies switched. Travis stated that claims that Magnus has a small penis are "uncanonical."
- In a Periscope livestream on 2/11/17, Travis stated that Magnus has taken baking lessons from Taako.
- Magnus has phantasthma, or "fantasy asthma". 
TRAVIS: Listen. Respect above all else, I protect those who can't protect themselves, I respect Justice. That's Magnus's deal. CLINT: Okay, Ken doll. That's okay. TRAVIS: Magnus has a penis!
- Ep. 20, after some vines allegedly ate Magnus's penis off
References and Footnotes Edit
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767776528465850368
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767785035730677760
- ↑ JimmyMarks
- ↑ Ep. 4
- ↑ See this fan art for the first time it was used in Ep. 17.
- ↑ Twitter FAQ: https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767790331492532224
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767787068319760384
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767777838984486913
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767783745407553537
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767786042996953088
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767784322795466752
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767783139364237313
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767782821935083520
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767782659703599104
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767781382248603649
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767772860664406017
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767787357424803840
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767783003070267393
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767789830952681472
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767788291391455233
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767779380034699264
- ↑ "Magnus is 1000% #TeamBigDog, but I want him to end up with a tiny bearded terrier like Buttercup." Travis in twitter chat: https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767779061011808256
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767776618513330176
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767776387851808768
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767775978659713024
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767774920382242816
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767774368801943552; https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767784531013271552
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767774181652070402
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767786333033099265
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767773684824154112
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767788815696158720
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767786165843988480
- ↑ https://twitter.com/travismcelroy/status/767786502080389120
- ↑ As stated in The Live Boston Stunt Spectacular.
- ↑ During the The Adventure Zone: MaxFunCon East Live show.
- ↑ https://www.periscope.tv/w/1OwxWPRAOADKQ
- ↑ In the last episode of The Crystal Kingdom arc.